I regret that I'm not president because I think there is so much opportunity.
--Joe Biden, in an interview with Oprah Winfrey
If I were president--or hell, even if I were in Congress--what would I do with $40 billion? Hmm, that's a tough one, but I'd probably buy weapons for Nazis so they could fight a war I helped instigate against a country with the world's largest stockpile of nuclear weapons, thus leaving our very existence teetering on the precipice of annihilation. That's on top of the $15 billion I would have already given them the month before to führer--oops, haha--further their fascist cause. Then I'd guess I'd place sanctions on the enemy I'd made of the aforementioned nuclear-armed nation, which also is rich in natural resources. The upshot: escalating already inflated prices & exacerbating supply chain shortages here at home. What I can guarantee you I would never do is blow my wad on domestic programs such as providing universal healthcare, housing the homeless, feeding the hungry, blah blah blah, et cetera et cetera et cetera. C'mon man, where would I get the money for crap like that?
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